Love Reading Books

IT was at the end of my daughter’s fourth birthday party that Erika lost it.

She was crying as if her heart would break, she was kicking her feet making it next to impossible for her mom to help her into her boots and she was throwing her body back and forth.

Her mom stayed cool. in a soft voice she was saying, “Erika, I know you don’t want to leave but the party’s over. Erika, I am sorry you are unhappy but it’s time to leave.” the explanations went on.

Ericka did not hear a word.

Finally, Mom picked up the boots in one hand and the child in the other and went to the car. A few minutes later, I saw Erika fast asleep in her car seat.

Whew. Sometimes, explaining what is happening to our children makes no sense whatsoever.

“I will never say to my child, you’ll do it because I said so.” we don’t want to see our children being raised to be mindlessly obedient and to do what they’re told without understanding the reasons.

Explaining the rules and expectations helps our children to learn why we do what we do. They can understand that decisions are not always simple and that there are often unseen long-term consequences to our choices.

Which is all very well and good, but over-explaining can

easily backfire. or, as in the case of Erika, explaining to a child who is long past being able to hear is just a waste of time.

Our explanations are often far too complex for young children. while a short, simple reason is fine, they are too young to understand long explanations. They aren’t ready to follow and act on adult logic.

Toddlers and preschoolers are waiting to see what we’re going to do. while we talk, they wait. we can explain to three-year-old Oliver that he must sit in his car seat because it’s safe. we can even talk about what might happen in an accident if he were sitting with just a regular seat belt. But until we actually put him in the seat or give him the choice to sit in his car seat or stay home, he just won’t get it.

I talk to a lot of parents who believe that if we explain the situation, the kids will automatically change their behaviour to meet our needs. the reality often is that the children aren’t even sure what is being asked of them.

Five-year-old Shayla runs into the house in her muddy shoes and races into the kitchen, leaving dirty footprints in her wake. Her mom rushes in and says, “Shayla, I just washed that floor.”

“Oh,” is the neutral response as Shayla continues on her way, making even more mess.

“Shayla, I just washed that floor!” her mom shrieks as she grabs her, takes her to the back door and removes the offending shoes.

Shayla still doesn’t get it.

If her mom had said, “Shayla, shoes off now. I just washed that floor and you’re making it dirty again,” the five-year-old would know what to do and why. But she just didn’t get the connection between the job her mom had done (So she washed the floor, so what? who cares? Certainly not Shayla who’s keen to get into the house.), and the behaviour that was required.

You need to tell her in simple language exactly what you need from her.

Children quickly learn that they can forestall their parents by asking questions, and then more questions. If we’re determined to explain we will keep talking.

Half an hour later, instead of going to bed or walking the dog, the kids have us deep into a discussion of “what’s fair.”

If they manage to outlast us (and kids have lots of patience for fruitless discussion!), we may well end up letting them off the hook: “Oh, forget it! I’ll walk the damn dog myself!”

Lecturing is easy. Dealing with a child who is unhappy is not. But if we truly want to help our children, we need to help them to experience what will happen to them as a result of their actions. Explaining, then throwing up our hands in despair when our children do not respond in the way we had hoped, doesn’t work.

Parents who refuse to deal with an unhappy child who does not, at that moment, “love” them, are parents who are neglecting the work of parenting.

Kathy Lynn is a parenting expert who is a professional speaker and author of Who’s in Charge Anyway? and But nobody told Me I’d Ever Have to Leave Home. If you want to read more, sign up for her informational newsletter at parentingtoday.ca.

© Copyright (c) North Shore News      

Seeing as Halloween lands on a Monday this year, for many of us the most debaucherous festive parts of the holiday came and went this weekend. but Halloween is far from over. Tonight, an estimated 41-million trick-or-treaters will take to the streets en masse to demand candy from you, egg your house, and TP the trees in your front yard.

The point is, you’re going to need something to keep yourself — and anyone you’re handing out candy with — distracted, and sane. To that end, we’ve collected a list of ten things you probably didn’t know about Halloween, that you can ruminate on or discuss to your heart’s content. who knows, you could even become “that weird house that doles out candy and Halloween trivia.”

On second thought, perhaps it would be best if you kept some of these facts to yourself.

10. Halloween will give you diarrhea well, not Halloween per se. To be more specific, consuming too much candy that contains the sweeteners fructose and sorbitol can give you diarrhea. however, the tendency for children and adults to tuck into excessive amounts of sweets on all Hallows’ Eve (the biggest candy-scarfing holiday of the year) has earned this particular variety of GI-trouble the nickname “Halloween diarrhea.” in any case, if you’re assembling a list of things to say to trick or treaters when you open your front door, “this is going to give you a wicked case of diarrhea!” is something you might want to leave out.

9. Halloween can cause heart failure Alright, fine, so Halloween isn’t directly responsible here, either; once again, the culprit is candy — black licorice, to be precise. just six days ago, the FDA released a warning explaining that you can actually overdose on black licorice. According to the FDA, black licorice contains the sweetening compound glycyrrhizin, the over-consumption of which can cause potassium levels in the body to drop, leading to abnormal heart rhythms, high blood pressure, swelling, lethargy, and congestive heart failure. So how much licorice is too much? The FDA says consuming just two ounces of black licorice a day for any longer than a couple of weeks could have serious health repercussions.

8. It’s easier than you might think to eat 2 ounces of candy a day in fact, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, in 2010 The U.S. per capita consumption of candy was 24.7 pounds. This means that, on average, everyone in the U.S. eats about one ounce of candy every day.

Of course, this is just an average, and most of us don’t eat a uniform amount of candy every day; on some days we really load up, like on the ones that bookend holidays like Halloween. and remember, 24.7 pounds is just an average; roughly half of the population is on the right hand side of that candy-consumption bell curve.

7. There is a family of genes named after Halloween The Halloween genes are a set of genes found in Drosophila melanogaster (i.e., fruit flies) that play an important role in embryonic development. a fly embryo with a mutation in one of its Halloween genes (which include the spook, disembodied, shade, phantom, and shadow genes) will die before its exoskeleton has the chance to form.

6. Halloween traditions actually bring out children’s evil sides when you’re a kid, the three most important parts of Halloween are candy, costumes, and trick-or-treating. and it just so happens that combining the three is a perfect recipe for inciting criminal behavior in children.

Group settings and masks are two factors that can give rise to what psychologists and sociologists refer to as a state of “deindividuation,” wherein people become less likely to evaluate their own behavior, and less apprehensive over the possibility that they’ll be recognized or observed by others. in other words, if you stick enough people together in a group and give them all masks, the social norms that guide their behavior can… loosen up a little bit. Especially if misbehaving means getting something they want. like candy.

This study, for example, found that children between the ages of 9 and 13 wearing Halloween masks were significantly more likely than unmasked children to take more candy than they were instructed to when they were left alone in a room with a supply of the sweet stuff.

The same behavior was observed in this study, which showed that children wearing costumes, when put in a group of other children with no clear authority figure, were significantly more likely to steal both candy and money when given the opportunity, than children who were either not anonymous (i.e. not in costume) or not in a group.

5. If every holiday had an opposing celebration, Halloween’s would be Christmas At least according to Russel Belk, who has a PhD in marketing and describes his research as the investigation of “the meanings of possessions, collecting, gift-giving, sharing, and materialism.” in a paper examining the cultural evolution of Halloween as an “American consumption ritual,” Belk makes a pretty compelling argument that Halloween is basically a mirror image of America’s other favorite “consumption” holiday: Christmas. Belk writes:

In the contemporary American Christmas celebration adults wear costumes (of Santa Claus) and extort good behavior from children with threats that rewards of durable goods will be withheld. in contemporary Halloween celebrations, American children wear costumes (often of “evil” beings) and extort treats of nondurable goods from adults with threats of property destruction. in Christmas rituals the extended family meets for a day of feasting (on wholesome foods) with a traditionally religious focus. in Halloween rituals children leave home and family to join other children for an evening of pranks in order to obtain unwholesome sweets in a decidedly nonreligious atmosphere. in Christmas rituals gifts are exchanged within the family and each is personally and lovingly acknowledged. in Halloween rituals non-family members provide gifts to masked and anonymous children who pose a vague menace.

4. The legend of “the Halloween Sadist” has likely cost the U.S. untold sums of money We’ve all heard some version of a story about a sicko who plants razor blades and needles in the goodies that they hand out on Halloween. The legend is so widespread that it led many communities to establish candy-inspection programs, some even going so far as to conduct X-ray screens of Halloween candy; in 1988, researchers in Reno, NV (one city where X-ray screens were being performed) determined:

The well-intentioned program of X-raying Halloween candy is costly. The annual expense to the 3 local hospitals in the Reno/Sparks area was $1625.62. The price to X-ray each bag ranged from $2.01 to $5.23 (average $3.38). on the basis of our total regional population statistics, the nation could be spending as much as $0.8-$1.4 million to screen Halloween candy…Of the 394 X-rays taken in the 3 local hospitals, and the 669 taken in 18 outlying hospitals, no films were positive for hidden radio-opaque foreign bodies. Not only is X-raying Halloween candy costly and ineffective, it also creates several problems. Children taking their candy to the hospital on Halloween night risk involvement in traffic accidents.

The researchers conclude, like many people have since, that the legend of “the Halloween Sadist” is essentially a big fat myth.

3. …except when it isn’t because there actually are confirmed cases of harmful objects showing up in kids’ candy. in 1974, Ronald Clark O’Brien (aka “The Candyman”) gave out cyanid-laced pixie sticks to his son and two other trick-or-treaters. only O’Brien’s son wound up eating the pixie sticks. in 2000, a man in Minnesota was arrested for planting needles in children’s Snicker bars. and in 2008, lollipops purchased from a dollar store were found to contain blades and other fragments of metal.

2. Dead bodies actually do get mistaken for Halloween decorations While we’re on the topic of Halloween urban legends that are actually true, lets talk about real-life dead decorations. As it turns out, this actually happens pretty regularly (see here and here).

1. a study about Halloween suggests that the term “spontaneous birth” is erroneous a recent Yale University study concluded that expecting mothers may actively be avoiding giving birth on Halloween, suggesting that the term “spontaneous birth,” which implies that childbirth is something outside the control of a pregnant woman, is “erroneous.” The authors write:

On Valentine’s Day, which conveys positive symbolism, there was a 3.6% increase in spontaneous births and a 12.1% increase in cesarean births. Whereas, on Halloween, which conveys negative symbolism, there was a 5.3% decrease in spontaneous births and a 16.9% decrease in cesarean births. these effects reached significance at p < .0001, after adjusting for year and day of the week. The sample was based on birth certificate information for all births in the United States within one week on either side of each holiday across 11 years. The Valentine’s-Day window included 1,676,217 births and the Halloween window included 1,809,304 births [...] This study raises the possibility that the assumption underlying the term “spontaneous births,” namely, that they are outside the control of pregnant women, is erroneous. for it appears that pregnant women can expedite or delay spontaneous births, within a limited time frame, in response to cultural representations.

Image Credits Top image via Zacarias Pereira da Mata/Shutterstock Creepy kids via Matinee as Hell Razor blade apple via Randy MacLean/Shutterstock Kid with chocolate via Zurijeta/Shutterstock Pregnant devil via

The associated PressThe Volt has a range of about 300 miles, thanks to the gas­oline engine that steps in to provide electricity to the mo­tor once the battery is drained. Chevy workers drove the car to Harrisburg from New York, and it averaged roughly 60 mpg.

When my editors asked me if I was interested in driving the Chevrolet Volt on Wednesday morning in Harrisburg, I answered with the grudging glee of a kid being shaken awake for Christmas morning. a thought process something along the lines of: I have to get up? Ugh. but there are presents! I’ll also admit right off the top that I want to love the Chevrolet Volt. I firmly believe we, as Americans, need this car. Whether you believe in climate change, agree that we’ve reached the tipping point in the world’s oil supply or care that most of the people with most of the oil don’t like us — in your heart of hearts, deep down, you know it can’t continue. You know we cannot continue indefinitely to drive wherever or whenever we want with no thought about the price of our American lifestyle. Bottom line: We will never see $1 gas again. And the creeping increase in gas prices — whether through supply, demand, conflict or greed — will one day begin to affect our daily lives, if it hasn’t already. the produce you buy will cost more. so, too, will the shirt you buy at Walmart. And we might eventually begin to think twice about driving to Taco Bell at 10 p.m. because we’re hungry and there’s nothing appealing in the fridge. the problem is our entire economy and standard of living is built around cheap, dependable transportation fueled by oil-based energy. And to date, we haven’t really found a magic bullet to replace it. Hybrids are just that — a hybrid compromise. They’re a good, first-step technology platform, but none of them really remove the crux of the problem — the internal combustion engine. Hydrogen-power vehicles could be the answer, but we would have to build the infrastructure nearly from scratch, creating a chicken-egg issue. Electricity, on the other hand, has the advantage of already having part of the infrastructure — our national grid — in place. but the current iteration of electric cars simply do not have the range to entice the average American. Realistically most of us don’t drive more than 40 miles per day — well within the range of the Nissan Leaf, the most mainstream of current crop of electric vehicles — but the idea of a constraining factor on our ability to drive goes against that deeply ingrained cultural ideal of “the open road.” Changes in battery technology could alter that in the indefinite future, but for now, the Leaf is not the vehicle that will put an electric car in every garage. Enter the Chevrolet Volt. I want to be able to tell you that the Volt is, in my humble opinion, the second-most important car in the history of the world behind the Ford Model T. the Model T picked your average Joe up out of the mud and gave the people of this nation a steering wheel and a new lifestyle. And I want to believe that the Volt, which drives just like a normal car but runs on electricity with a gas generator backup, will do the same thing as the Model T but in reverse. I also want to believe that an iconic American company can come back from filing for bankruptcy and near-ruin to change the world. And after I drove the Volt around town Wednesday, I almost did. It’s a smooth vehicle. it drives and feels like a car. not like a “transportation appliance,” as my father-in-law terms his Toyota Prius. it also looks sharp. the interior is well-designed, with comfortable room for four adults. Nice stereo to boot. there are also two LCD displays with enough technical data to provide information overload, but they manage to do it in a nonobtrusive way. most importantly, the Volt solves the range problem, reaching upwards of 300 miles, thanks to the gasoline engine that steps in seamlessly to provide electricity to the motor once the battery is drained. Chevy workers drove the car to Harrisburg from New York, and it averaged roughly 60 mpg. here then, is a worthy successor to the Ford Model T: the car that will bridge — for your average American — the divide between our old, familiar internal combustion engine and the electric or alternative energy cars of the future. but in my heart of hearts, I know the truth. it isn’t. the glory of the Model T — and what made it arguably the most important car in the world — was the price tag. it was the first car that the average factory worker could afford to buy. And that’s the Volt’s Achilles’ heel. its base price is $40,280, or roughly a year’s salary for your average Pennsylvanian. And that’s before you start worrying about the lithium-ion battery, which as with all electric-power cars, has a finite life. GM’s warranty will cover the battery for eight years or 100,000 miles. Then it’s on the owner to pay the replacement cost, which Chevy says it isn’t sure of because that horizon is too far away to price out. there are federal rebates and a Pennsylvania alternative-fuel program that will knock about $10,000 off the car’s price tag. but even after you factor those into the equation, it still costs three-quarters of a person’s annual income.

I’ll tell you, if I had the money, I’d buy a Volt tomorrow and be the happiest guy on the block. but I also have a wife, a rent payment and a baby on the way.

Randy Pausch was young, an inspiration, hard-working, family man.  he was a computer scientist at Carnegie Mellon… and he had terminal cancer.

When asked to give a lecture about life and act like it is your last lecture… Randy did not have to pretend.  he knew very well this would be his last lecture.  yet instead of lecturing about dying, he chose to talk about LIVING.  Randy’s lecture included dreams from his childhood, over coming obstacles, not taking no for an answer when you really want something, enabling others to dream, and seizing each moment as none of us know which will be our last. 

With humor, brutal honesty, and a sprinkle of intelligence, Randy pours his heart into a lecture he hopes will be a life lesson for his small children who would grown up without him, but not without what he stood for and believed in.  Randy’s lecture, is a love letter to his family – and a message of hope and strength to the world.

What I love about my book club, response #2049.    I jest, but you all know I love my book club.  Smart, incredible women who gather once a month to talk on one of  my favorite subjects…. books. 

In May, this was the book that was chosen for our June read.  what I love about this is that a few years ago… this group of

women would not have touched this book.  It would have never won the vote.  Why?  One its non fiction and we do not do a whole lot of that as a group.  Two, it is a pretty serious and the potential to be a sad read and my book club – at least a few years back, would have avoided that for something lighter.

By review time – I did not have this book read.  since they picked it I had been to new York for a week for BEA, two large bike rides on the weekends, and a nasty injury that threw me off my game.  I also could not find it in my library and really did not want to order it, not knowing much about it.  When it did come in for me at the library it was in audio and it was also the day of the review. 

Their discussion… made me want to read it all the more.

So finally – after a crazy trip to Chicago, I had time to tune in and catch up and here is what I thought of The last Lecture.

Randy Pausch has a gift of words.  I entered into this read knowing very little about Randy, or this lecture which apparently is now quite famous.  what I learned quickly is that Randy did not lack for self-esteem.  he saw what he wanted and went after it.  end of story.  he speaks of this in The last lecture as “brick walls”, advising that when we come up against a brick wall we are to keep on trying to get over it, be it a personal opportunity, a job deeply wanted, or, as in Randy’s case – a death sentence.

Yes, I can see where Randy may come off as arrogant, but as I ended this reading…. I didn’t think so.  It’s probably a fine line between arrogance and drive and Randy rode it right down the middle.  Where most of us would probably wilt under the weight of Randy’s diagnosis, Randy seemed to be energized.  in the 18 months from diagnosis to passing, Randy used this time to prepare his family for life without him, including moving the family to a home closer to his wife Jai’s family so she would have help with the kids after he was gone. 

This book was a firm reminder that life is what we make of it, we choose our responses in every situation… Randy lived life to the fullest as long as he was able.  With a quick wit and sharp mind he reminds us to never give up on our dreams, seize the moments, overcome all obstacles. 

I laughed a little, I cried a little and am glad to now know a little of who Randy was.

Pausch died from pancreatic cancer at his family’s home in Chesapeake, Virginia on July 25, 2008, at the age of 47. he is survived by his wife, Jai, and their three children, Dylan, Logan, and Chloe

I have updated the 2011 WHERE are You Reading to include The last Lecture

Borrowed from my local Library

Filed under: audio review, Being Bookie Tagged: | Audio, Bookies, Review

The Glass CastleBy Jeannette WallsSimon & SchusterJanuary 2006304pp

The Short of It:

At its core, The Glass Castle is a story of survival which will break your heart and leave you cheering.

The Rest of It:

As I get older, I find that books mean more to me. The messages contained within are not always easy to decipher, but The Glass Castle left me with a wonderful sense of peace.

Jeannette Walls could be my long-lost sister. she doesn’t know this, of course, but we share quite a few similarities and grew-up in very similar households. The Walls family lived the life of nomads. Rex and Rose Mary Walls were “creative” types. Their big dreams often outweighed the fact that the family hungry, without proper clothing and living in housing that was basically held together by band-aids. Add to this the fact that they had four children and you’ve got a bit of a mess on your hands.

After getting 3rd degree burns while trying to keep the house warm, Jeannette’s older sister Lori is given this little bit of knowledge by her mother:

What doesn’t kill you will make you stronger.”

The resiliency expressed in that short statement is as refreshing as it is frustrating. Rex aspires to be an inventor and has high hopes and big ideas that never come to fruition. Rose Mary, is an artist and feels that working a regular job would interfere with her desire to paint. as obstacles overcome them, and alcoholism and depression come into play, they choose to flee instead of dealing with their particular situation.

When they are not running, they are dreaming of “a glass castle” where all is perfect and beautiful.

In between lapses of better judgment, there are moments of genuine affection. Quite a bit of it. It’s clear that Rex, loved his children very much. I also felt that Rose Mary had love for her children as well, but she was so wrapped-up in a false sense of happiness to really see the damage their lifestyle was causing on the family as a whole.

If these kids fell down, they had to pick themselves up. If they were hungry, they had to find their own food which often meant digging through trash cans. If they had a problem at school, they had to resolve it themselves. Yes, this created very independent kids who could stand on their own two feet, but at what cost? one wonders.

The book is basically a collection of stories told from Jeannette’s point of view and follows her from childhood into adulthood. Each section  is very brief, which is good because you will be frustrated by these parents and the living condition that these children are forced to endure.

I found it slightly episodic and repetitive. I would have liked a bit more of a  transition between the stories, but when I think back on my childhood, my memories are episodic as well so I didn’t let this little quibble interfere with my reading.

In case you’re interested, here are some similarities between Jeannette’s experience and my own. Pardon me for using her first name but I feel as if I know her personally:

• We both had furniture that was unconventional. she had tables made out of empty spools and I had cinder block couches and shelves. no comfy reading chairs for me.
• Major injuries were not always treated by a medical professional. I broke my leg when I was 9 and my Dad told me that a cast would make my leg weaker. four years of adult ballet were necessary to correct my turn out.
• Jeannette made her own set of braces out of rubber bands and a feminine hygiene products. my braces were made out of paperclips and rubber bands. Check out my profile pic, did they do the job?
• Her father took their savings and spent it on drink. my father took my savings too. I’ve no idea what he spent it on but I believe Vegas was in the mix.
• The Walls refused to be on welfare. my parents did the same, even though we went without food for as many as 5 days at a time.
• Christmas was bunk. Kids were spoiled by materialistic extravagances. Rex and Rose Mary saved their kids from all that. mine did too.

The list goes on. The only difference between her family and mine, is that I have no fond memories of my childhood. as frustrating as her situation must have been, she never seemed to lose hope and her father, in his own twisted way, tried to impress upon them the importance of imagination and forward thinking.

You’re probably wondering how such a book, with so many similarities to my own life could leave me with an overwhelming sense of peace. Well, we both managed to pull ourselves out of a very bad situation and we’re sane, functioning members of society. I believe that the individuals I came in contact with, inspired me to rise above my situation. I believe the same can be said for Jeannette and most of her siblings. You just never know which act of kindness will be remembered later.

This book has been around for quite some time but we just picked it for next year’s Freshman Common Reading book. I think professors will be able to work it into their curriculum no matter what their discipline, be it economics, family and consumer sciences, ethnic studies, gender studies, psychology, sociology, etc.

Source: Review copy provided by the publisher, via the Freshman Common Reading program at CSUN.

Filed under: Book Review, Life Tagged: | © 2011 Book Chatter, Coming of Age, Freshman Common Reading, Jeannette Walls, Memoir, Poverty, The Glass Castle

You have been severed from Christ, you who are seeking
to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace.

Fallen From Grace And I Can’t get Up

A number of years ago there was a humorous, yet memorable, commercial about a product for the home bound and the elderly. The product was a device that, with a push of a button, would alert a loved one or caretaker that the elderly person had become incapacitated in some way. The commercial featured a senior citizen who was shown laying on the floor of her home desperately calling out to anyone who might hear her, Help Help I’ve fallen and I can’t get up I’m assuming the masses of viewers cried out in anguish as I did, ‘If only she had the XYZ alert buzzer

Friends, there is another kind of incapacitation that has occurred in the body of Christ today. It is not, however, a physical condition. It is a condition of the heart and the mind in those who, of all people, should know the peace of God, which passes all comprehension (Philippians 4:7). The afflicted have also fallen like the elderly woman in the commercial, only theirs is not a tumble to the ground but rather a fall from grace.

Let me reassure you that falling from grace does not mean that we lose our righteousness before God, for if it is by grace, it is no longer on the basis of works, otherwise grace is no longer grace (Romans 11:6). To say that God’s grace can be taken away from you, or forfeited by you through your actions and deeds, is to contradict the very definition of the word. Grace is no longer grace if it is initially attained, or perpetually kept, through our performance. The apostle Paul taught that it was impossible for those in Christ to lose their salvation (Romans 8:38-39), going so far as to say that nothing present or anything to come could separate us from his love.

Who Has Fallen from Grace?

So what does it mean to fall from grace? The answer lies not in religion, not in tradition, not in how you feel about it, but in the Word of truth. In fact, Paul tells us in no uncertain terms who the people are who have fallen from grace. He declares that you who are seeking to be justified by law; you have fallen from grace (Gal. 5:4). Read it again. who is it that has fallen from grace? is it those who are living in sin (a.k.a. sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll) that we in the church so frequently condemn and point the finger at as those who have fallen? No, it is remarkably the opposite. Those who have fallen from grace are those who are seeking to be justified by the law That’s right. To fall from grace is to knowingly or unknowingly revert back to thinking that you can do something to maintain the right standing you already have with God through Jesus Christ. It is foolishness that all of us have fallen into at one time or another and it is the greatest deception that the body of Christ has ever faced.

If the grace of God is undeserved, unmerited, unearned favor with God, then how can you lose it? The answer is you can’t. his grace was never something He rewarded you with because of your great performance. It was a gift that He lovingly bestowed upon us and then asked for nothing in return other than our thanks. And yet the gift is much more that that. there is life and power in God’s grace from one moment to the next as we rest in it. In fact, it is his grace that is instructing us to deny ungodliness and worldly desires and to live sensibly, righteously and godly in the present age.zealous for good deeds (Titus 2:11-14).

To Fall From Grace is To put Yourself Back Under Law

Paul’s letter to the Galatians was not dealing with their embracing a lifestyle of sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll. just the opposite was the case. these dear folks had drifted backwards in their thinking about the gospel to which they had once so gratefully responded. The road they were sadly traveling back down again was the road of law-keeping for righteousness. Paul, therefore, was disappointed and perplexed that they were so quickly deserting Him who called you by the grace of Christ, for a different gospel; which is really not another; only there are some who are disturbing you, and want to distort the gospel of Christ (Galatians 1:6-7).

Read this letter very closely and you will quickly see the common theme that runs throughout. according to Paul, there were false brethren who had sneaked in to spy out our liberty which we have in Christ Jesus, in order to bring us into bondage (Galatians 2:4). Peter himself began to withdraw and hold himself aloof (from the Gentiles), fearing the party of the circumcision (Galatians 2:12) and the consequences he might face from them for enjoying his freedom in Christ. This in turn put others back in bondage to law as the rest of the Jews joined him (Peter) in hypocrisy, with the result that even Barnabas was carried away by their hypocrisy (Galatians 2:11-13).

The issue at hand continues as Paul writes that by the works of the Law shall no flesh be justified (Galatians 2:16) and that if righteousness comes through the Law, then Christ died needlessly (Galatians 2:21). He goes on to ask several rhetorical questions juxtaposing the works of law against faith in Christ, perhaps for the purpose of waking the Galatians from their foolish state of mind (Galatians 3:1-5). Paul goes on to point out that those who are of faith are blessed with Abraham, the believer while those who are of the works of the law are under a curse (Galatians 3:9-10). Like a tenacious bulldog, Paul presses on with his mission of dispelling any notion that a man can be right with God through his performance. He reminds the people that no one is justified by the Law before God is evident, that the law is not of faith, and Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the Law.so that we might receive the promise of the Spirit through faith (Galatians 3:11-14).

You Have Fallen From Grace If You believe Righteousness is Earned

Folks, think about it. Why would Paul be bringing these things up if the Galatians were standing confidently in the finished work of their Savior? If their falling from grace was tied to a sex, drugs, and rock-and-roll debacle, why doesn’t he address these issues? I’ll tell you why. It’s because they were not standing firm in the faith. Their bondage was to working for righteousness, not drinking Budweisers. The deception that the Galatians had fallen for was the same one that has plagued the saints throughout history. They were doubting the testimony of Paul concerning the righteousness they had in Jesus Christ. They, like so many through the ages, were going back to the law, back to their works, in an attempt to justify themselves before the Lord. And it is that very mindset that puts you, me, and anyone else into the miserable condition of having fallen from grace.

Paul’s impassioned plea to these confused saints in the first century is his same plea to us today: It was for freedom that Christ set us free; therefore keep standing firm and do not be subject again to a yoke of slavery (Galatians 5:1). trying to work for right standing with God will do nothing but knock you down, put you on your back, and make you feel like there is no way to get up out of your misery. Friend, if you fall for that trap, the way you get right back up on your feet is by renewing your mind once again on the most comforting and reassuring message ever proclaimed.the gospel of the grace of God (Acts 20:24)

Have You Fallen From Grace?

Friend, because of what Christ has done for you, you are now seated high on the highest mountaintop of all that God has to give you. You reside on the peek of grace mountain, seated in fact in the heavenlies (Ephesians 2:6). there is no loftier position a man can enjoy. your righteousness is a gift that is now forever yours. there are no exchanges, no refunds, no recalls. You’re stuck with the gift whether you choose to believe it, enjoy it, or not.

Have you fallen from grace? I hope not. but if you have, you will know it because your confidence will have switched from what Jesus has done to what you are doing. The peace and the joy that you once knew will be replaced by fear, anxiety, and condemnation day after day. Why? because your doing can never measure up to the righteous requirements of the law. Heck, you can’t even measure up to your own standards or that of your neighbor

So what is the solution? It is to believe the gospel and to rest in knowing that having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ (Romans 5:1). Continually remind yourself of the righteousness that is now yours in Christ according to the gospel given to the apostle Paul by the risen, ascended Christ.

Do not give in to the temptations all around you to work your way into right standing with God. get up, my friend, and stand firm in the truth He has made you right and to try to add to what He has done is to say you think He did not complete the task.and another fall from grace.

Don’t you just hate it when you find your hair in your towel, on your brush and in the sink? Well so do I. so I did some research on why I am losing mine. The results I found will amaze you on causes of hair loss.

Here is the normal cycle for a strand to grow. It will grow for two to six years, at about a quarter inch a year. Then it ceases to grow, rests, and eventually falls out. a new strand then replaces it.

The most common cause for the loss in man is the formation of dihydrotestosterone(DHT). The enzyme called 5 alpha reductase, combines with testosterone to form DHT. The DHT attaches to the hair follicle causing it to die and fall out, never to grow again, unless herbal supplements are taken to remove the DHT. not having very many testosterones, women do not form very much DHT. not to say women do not have this loss. Read on to see how other conditions promote this loss, in both men and women.

This loss can occur for a host of reasons. For example, if you go to a barbershop or beauty salon, you can contact ringworms. These ringworms will cause both men and women to lose their hair.

Medical conditions can cause both men and women to lose their hair. Such conditions as thyroid disease, heart disease, high fever, and serious infections are all possible conditions that can cause hair loss. Stress can cause hair loss. Such stress as divorce, loss of a love one-childbirth, etc can all result in loss of hair.

It’s plain to see why the people at the Davenport Freight HouseFarmers Market couldn’t accept that Stewart the cat would have justwandered off.

That cat’s got it made, right where he is.

In one 15-minute span Saturday afternoon, Stewart was fed a bowlof dry cat food, a can of Fancy Feast wet cat food and a chunk offresh catfish. and he was stroked and cooed at by a half-dozenpeople.

What’s to run away about?

“I am so glad he’s back,” market manager Ann Geiger said,petting Stewart as he rubbed his little gray head against her hand.“He’s the heart of this market.”

For two worrisome weeks, Stewart was gone. a Scott Countyteenager saw him in the area of the Freight House and, believing hewas homeless, took him to her family farm. when her mother read inthe Quad-City Times that Stewart was missing, she realized the catwas hot and returned him to the market.

You would have thought he’d just returned from a deployment toAfghanistan.

For several hours Saturday morning, Stewart evidently took along, don’t-bug-me nap under the Freight House deck, which is hishome most of the time. People called and called for him, but hedidn’t show up until about 1 p.m.

“I think he was just really tired,” Geiger said. “An awful lotof people were very glad to see him this morning.”

So what is it about this one stray cat that makes him sospecial?

“I think he found us because we needed him,” said Theresa Lemek,the chairman of the farmers market board. “We had strife in themarket for several years, and he saved us.”

Geiger referred to Stewart as “unity cat” because he has broughtmarket vendors together in mutual affection for the animal. Andthat wasn’t a particularly easy sell, given the number of vendorswho said they were “not cat people” until Stewart showed up.

Though some have quarreled with the categorization of Stewart“belonging to” the market, many of the vendors say he’s more than amascot.

Breadmaker Jacob Border of Davenport put it this way: “We are atwice-a-week household here. we are roommates, and Stewart is ourpet. we know him very well. He is very affectionate toward women,and he bites the ankles of men, especially when I’m carrying lotsof bread.”

To view him from afar, Stewart is a fairly regular-looking cat.On closer inspection, however, it becomes clear that hispersonality is part of what makes him special. He seems togenuinely like everybody, and he’s happy to take in all theaffection his little frame can handle.

At one point Saturday, there were five people touching Stewartat once — patting his head, scratching his chin, petting his paws.and he just sat there.

One market regular read about his return and delivered blanketsand food Saturday morning. some vendors were not yet aware he wasback and shouted “Stewart!” when they saw him at his regular spoton the deck.

“For now, he’ll be a commuter cat,” Geiger said. “I’ll be takinghim home with me at night. We’ll be meeting soon to decide what todo in the long term. we know one thing: He will not spend anotherwinter outdoors.

“We have a collar on him now and we’ll see how that goes. Hetook the last one off. If he keeps this one, we’ll put tags onit.”

Vendor Jeanie Spangler has taken up collections for Stewart inthe past, spending the money on his neutering, a microchip andshots. She keeps a collection pot at her booth for his continuedcare and feeding.

“People have been asking about him nonstop today,” she said.

Surely she would know what is so special about the marketcat.

“Honestly, I don’t know,” she said. “I’m not a cat lover, buthe’s wonderful. I don’t know why he’s special, but he is. He tugsat my heart.”

Mike Grady, “the fish guy” at the market, saw Stewart at hisfood bowl on the deck Saturday and rushed back inside the FreightHouse to fetch some fresh fish.

“Oh, yeah, he likes the smell of that,” he said as Stewartjabbed at the fish chunk with his paw between licks. “He’s probablyremembering fish from his wild cat days.”

Those days are so over.

Contact Barb Ickes at (563) 383-2316 or bickes@qctimes.com.